Beta? Pretty pretty please? :)

I need a concrit-y beta for my HD Hols fic ... more along the lines of substance than commas, if you know what I mean. Do the scenes flow well, should there be more of them, does everything make sense, should I completely axe this scene or that character or whatever?

It's obviously H/D ... I don't want to give away the kinks/squicks because that would be telling, but comment or e-mail me if you'd be willing to do it and then I'll try to warn you away. :)

ETA: Taken care of, thanks!